The Honesty Train

All Aboard!!!

Yep here comes the honesty train . . .


I had a bad day yesterday. It started with me getting on the scale again.



Yes I know. I promised I was only going to get on the scale twice a week.


I was down, but with me sometimes how much I'm down is not proportionate to how much effort I have put in the days before. I know it's the way it works, it's easy to put on and harder to take off.

I think my mood was made worse by a couple of things. This weekend we went out to dinner with another couple and we went to a place that has really yummy, but not good for you food. I did good. I went in with a plan and executed my plan. The problem is, it wasn't fun. My meal wasn't horrible, but for the first time I resented it. I resented the fact that I had to get a chicken breast when really it was the last thing that I wanted. I didn't eat my roll, which in reality was the thing I wanted to eat the most out of my meal. I even let my husband have my leftovers the next day, which is unlike me.

Then my dearest friend who has had the gastric bypass surgery sent me a text update on her weight loss. She's lost 51 lbs. Now first let me say that she is family to me. We have been friends for so long that at some point we became family instead of just friends. I am without a doubt beyond happy for her and she deserves happiness. In fact she has deserved happiness for a long time. I would be lying if I told you that it's hard sometimes to be working my butt off to only lose .2 of a pound and she's lost 51 lbs without even blinking an eye. YES, I know that what she did is way more drastic and life changing and that I was well aware that she would be losing weight rapidly. YES, I know that it would be impossible to lose that amount of weight that quickly doing it the way I'm doing it (Calorie Counting & Exercise). My head knows that, but it is still a hard pill to swallow.

Last night I ate stuff I shouldn't have. I'm not going to push it under the rug. I'm going on my daily plate right now and counting everything I ate. I need to see it in black and white. I need to come to terms with it and then I need to move on. I'm already back to eating my regular healthy way this morning & will continue to fight it. I have a tendency to eat something I shouldn't and then continue in a binge free for all for a couple of days. I'm not going to allow that to happen this time. Really that is what this whole journey is about . . . finding different ways to deal with everyday things. If I do the same thing I always do then I will always be the same. That's not good enough. To get different results I need to do things differently.